Did you know that lack of social interaction is detrimental to your health? According to one study, social isolation is as detrimental to your health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day!
We need relationships, we need connections, we need one another.
Here’s the thing, you need to make sure your relationships are healthy. Having a toxic relationship can be just as devastating to your health.
I often share with clients one way to know if you are in a toxic or unhealthy relationship. Ask yourself this question . . .
“Am I working harder than they are to make this relationship work?
If the answer to that is yes, it does not necessarily mean you ditch the relationship altogether (unless you find that is truly the best decision). Difficult relationships are your most powerful teachers and can be the best thing that happens to you both.
Here is a two-step process to confront a strained relationship:
Check your own toxicity first: Ask yourself . . . “Is this relationship bringing out the best or worst in me?” If the worst, you have some soul searching to do. Many make the mistake of saying things like “he makes me so mad” “or “she is too sensitive and that’s why we don’t get along sometimes.” It’s the blame game. By blaming the other person and not taking responsibility for your own reactions and feelings, you give power away to change it. The truth is, the other person’s behavior is bringing out a reaction within you that already exists. That reaction is yours and yours alone to work through. You will not have a fulfilling relationship with anyone as long as that part of you remains unhealed.
Confront the relationship: Once you identify your own emotional blocks and are clearer, it is time to confront the relationship. Coming from a loving and compassionate place, invite the other person to get real and honest. No matter how difficult the conversation will be (and it will), it needs to be discussed. Keep in mind that true intimacy with another person can only happen when you take the risk of being authentic and transparent.
The more honest you are with yourself, the more you will “weed out” the toxic relationships in your life, which is a good thing. You see, this opens up space for the fulfilling relationships you are meant to experience. Be willing to step out of your comfort zone. You will be amazed at the results and your health will thank you for it.
If you are stuck, wondering how to create more fulfilling relationships, consider my Fulfillment Assessment. I would love to work with you!